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If you are new here to BrinaLynn, you may not know our story. While I wouldn’t have chosen the path we were given, Lord used it to get me here. However, that doesn’t mean it’s easy to figure out how to move through betrayal.
I was extremely lonely, and it has taken time and effort and intentionality to move through all that I felt during that time. There are ways to push through feelings of betrayal, though it’s not easy. My story began on a quiet night several years ago, and very well remember how I felt, the sadness and anger that overcame me, and the despondency that overtook me.
My goal is to encourage anyone feeling betrayed and to be an Aaron when you are too weak to hold yourself up.
The Hurt, Anger, Fear and Comparison
The hurt is real. I spent days and weeks in a defeated and lonely state. I was so broken I didn’t even know if I could carry on with life.
Lashing out had become my norm, and I couldn’t make it stop. The pouring out from my heart was a direct reflection of how I was feeling. At times anger overwhelmed me, and I wanted to hurt him as much as he had hurt me.
To top it all off, there’s continual fear and comparison. I found myself afraid for my husband to be home alone or to work with women or to do anything without me. At the same time, I found myself trying to measure up or wondering why I hadn’t. Only to realize, there was no way I ever could measure up to the woman on the screen.
Truthfully, trusting my husband is still something I struggle with. I have to seek the Lord often because the enemy uses the fact that he lied once to remind me that he could lie again. [Read the entire article…]
Click here to read the whole article over at Transforming Normal!
Congrats. Thank you for sharing your heart on something so tender.
Shan
Thank you! 🙂